Friday, April 30, 2010

Storm...

1/2 cup cooked oatmeal with pure maple syrup
2 pieces of bread
grass in the backyard

113 lb dog won't eat.

I've learned how to IV a dog, change solutions, monitor heart rate, check vital signs what I can't seem to do is find something he will eat.

This beloved fur kid who less than 2 weeks ago was bounding around the yard, demanding to be loved and kissed, is a shell of who he was. I want to give him time to recover from all the surgery, kidney issues, but my question remains: will he.

He follows me around the house, crawled up onto my bed this morning and curled up, flicked a paw in my face to rub his chest... but he would not eat more. I'd give him more bread but with the bloat, I'm scared to give too much and have him bloat again.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

No Sleep In 4 Months

Went to my own doc yesterday... the last few/several months having finally taken their toll on my body, mind, energy; I feel like $#it. Physician asked me how often I slept through the night, I could not remember the last time. Physician asked me about my test anxiety, I said it was controllable now and that I no longer blackout during the exam.

So, she said she was going to prescribe Ambien for me but gave this gentle warning:

Try it on the weekends first so you don't get med-head and are drowsy all day.

And this:

There are some reported cases of sleepwalking, people cooking while on it that the individuals don't remember the next day. People have been found outside, wandering, then brought home and do not remember that either.

NOTE TO SELF:

wear clothes to bed now.

I tend to like to sleep... without them. hee hee (TMI TMI TMI)

No need for the neighbors, or my son, to see ... what a doctor sees :D

And with that, I started to giggle... which spread to a full on chuckle... which then led me to completely laugh.

Felt great!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Chart Reading 101 - Edited

Below are the readings that were ABNORMAL from Storm's charts yesterday at the university. They are apparently normal for a dog with kidney disease...

It does not tell me he will live, or whether he will be put to sleep.

It just is. His readings are better this afternoon, 24 hours post last labs. They are not normal quite yet, and he is still not eating.

READING RESULT


REF RANGE
BUN 87


9-31
Creatinine 3.8


.6 - 1.6


Osmolality 321


285 - 310

Alkaline Phosphatase 1469


8 - 139



GGT 35


0 - 6
Amylase 2535


275 - 1056


Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Storm's Saga ...

He was transferred today back to his regular vet. Reluctant to get into the truck with its small side doors but too weak to jump into the back like normal.

7 days and he's gone from jumping into truck to wobbling on his feet

The trip seemed to be too short... half an hour to the regular vet's office, another half hour to convince Storm to walk down the plank, catheter sticking out of his leg and all.

My vet's face said a lot... he does not hold out hope that the recovery can be complete enough for Storm to not need daily sub-dermal injections of IV fluids, 500 cc... every day.

I can do that short term, I have no problem with that but long term quality of life for a great dane that 7 days ago was happy, perking his ears, wagging his tail, and begging to crawl onto my bed with me.

Quality of life for my boy... am I trying to give him that? or am I just being really greedy?

Hard to decipher what I feel when mostly, it is just empty. He perked his ears in the back end of the truck at the vet office, I took that as a good sign... even raising his head to get a better look. I kind of think he'd rather just be home getting medicated, not in over-nighted in a kennel. I kind of think he'd rather he was with me, sleeping on the floor next to him for short periods of time, not merely smelling the scent of his family.

Storm ... Was Admitted

To the university vet hospital tonight. He would not eat, would not really get up to go outside, tongue dark pink, drinking lots of water.

I was worried about sepsis setting in; some of the clinical signs of it presenting.

Thankfully, that is not the issue. His lab tests show sepsis is not a concern.

Kidney failure is.

I can't catch a break right now with him... and its digging a Grand Canyon in my heart.

What test? Oh, the test on biochem and whatever else? Think I care? I don't.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Marmaduke Is Coming Out

I have a polite request, to all of you:

Please, if you go see the movie, please know Great Danes are different dogs and if you are tempted to buy a puppy, PLEASE research this breed, visit rescues, visit SHOW breeders homes, go to show if necessary, research some more, visit some more, and then MAYBE get a dane.

We owners of this breed, who truly care about their health, lifespan (short), and welfare are nervous. Thankfully, the movie trailer shows Marmaduke engaging in typical Dane behavior:

counter surfing
jumping out of bath tubs
ill-trained dane dragging its owner across a park
ill-trained dane barging through people
ill-trained and managed dane destroying the house

These things are NOT UNCOMMON in a dane that is not well trained, they are, in fact, very typical. That cute little puppy that weighs 20 lbs at 3 months of age, will quickly become 190 lbs of 1.5 year old, teenage, exuberance.

Storm - as he lies here recovering from the nastiest incision I have ever seen - was the naughtiest puppy I've ever owned and I was not a first time dane owner... I'd rescued, fostered, rehomed, and loved adult danes before.

Storm is well bred meaning his father is the sire to many of the championship lines that exist today. His sire and dam's health was checked for hips, thyroid, heart, eyes, etc. There was a guarantee on him until age two. His AKC meant nothing, means nothing other than his parents are certified as purebred. The parental health checks meant that I was only guaranteed they were not poor in hips, eyes, heart, thyroid NOT that issues would not arise. I thought I had done my research and I still ended up with a very naughty, very mischievous boy... that I came to adore... but it was not always that way.

I am a decent dog owner but I think I can do better.

Marmaduke looks hilarious... especially for those of who know, the scenes depicted are not Hollyweird fantasy but actual events that happen with danes.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

T-26

In 26 days I can kiss chemistry buh bye and while I really love the subject, I'm really, really sick of thermo, rate laws, ... and can't wait to get back to biochem, micro, and bio.

Looming exam prep? Nada. Yikes!!

Looming lab report write up? Nada. Yikes!!

Looming garage sale to pay-for-vet-bill-was-to-pay-for-tuition prep? Nada. Yikes!!

Maybe I should not be here, finding any reason whatsoever to stall.

Oh look! Storm wagged his tail and licked his lips, that surely must mean *something*, right? :D

Saturday, April 24, 2010

My Beloved...


IS HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


(pics to come later, after exam prep, I'm going to be doing research on canine bloat and torsion for publication here, and who knows if I'll get it published elsewhere).

(edited to add: water bowl full, check. food bowl with small amount of prescription food, check. Storm?? Storm... Storm?? head in garbage, rooting around! and no, no garbage was harmed by the rooting great dane :D )

Friday, April 23, 2010

And There In The Coolness Of The Vet Clinic


Storm, replete with tubes in his paw, blood draining out of his stomach, water dish lying empty
.
.
.
stood to attempt licking my face, slight wag of the tail, ears perked slightly when I asked, "Wanna come home?"

The news I have held my breath for, the news I gingerly asked for is here:

Me: "When will you be comfortable thinking he's gonna make it and the stomach won't turn necrotic?"

Vet: "I'm thinking he's gonna make it; I'm thinking he's going home... maybe even tomorrow."

And then tears... of relief, of joy, of finally NOT losing something precious to me.

Storm Trooper Extraordinaire.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

And There In The Coolness - Update #5


of the April morning, Storm started acting funny... staggering on his feet, panting short breaths, foaming at the mouth, unable to drink or sit or lie down.

As I type this with reddened eyes, my Storm trooper is in surgery... I have no idea if he will make it or not. If his stomach is too gone, I will have him euthanized.

To many, dogs are just dogs. Anyone who knows me understands my love for the furkids in my house is beyond just thinking they are fur, teeth, and nails. It is their hearts that I long for and at this moment, all I want to do is run my fingers through his fur, tell him he wasn't really the naughtiest dog I'd ever owned, just the most mischievous and that I love him. As I left, I smelled his fur, felt the softness of the downy coat, told him he was an amazing protector and love.

I'm praying he pulls through surgery.

UPDATE:

Storm pulled through surgery and only a tiny piece of his stomach was questionable. Vet says my fast action when I saw him going downhill probably saved his life. Far from the event being over or Storm out of the woods, this afternoon I will be with him... smelling his fur, rubbing his ears, letting him know I love him. At a minimum, I get to love him up a little more...

UPDATE #2:

He is not doing well tonight. I spent an hour or more with him stroking his fur, telling him I loved him, letting him know if it was his time, I would understand. Tongue hanging out the side of his mouth, his eyes fairly hazy, he barely moved.

I don't know if I will still have my friend tomorrow but I know if I don't, I got to say goodbye and got to love him, one last time.

Am I greedy for wanting more than that?

UPDATE #3:


I called the vet at 8:01 this morning because 7:59 or 8:00 would have appeared too anxious :P

Storm was out for a walk this morning with the vet techs. I'm on my way there to bring him his fluffy, double sided, insulated, comfy blanket that he sleeps on in my room... because you know, meds are one thing but scents of HOME are even better.

He is far from out of the woods. I've been researching pretty much all night, talking to online vets, getting opinions, and it can still go very wrong.

However, I'm going to unabashedly embrace my greediness with him and his life.

UPDATE #4:

Spent about an hour with my boy in his kennel, thankful I'd brought his flannel blanket with me. The vet is awesome but not equipped for great dane ICU so... he was on the floor on blankets but I wanted MORE insulation between the floor and his body.

After standing to greet me, sans waggy tail, he laid back down and once the yappy schnauzer shut-t-f-up, he relaxed and leaned into me, falling asleep. I took another blanket and covered him up; a breeder I trust (the one with the show pup I'd hope to get), said to keep him warm which will help him recover.

The vet said he is not out of the woods yet. I asked if 50/50 and she said she'd give him a little better than that, and it was far better than what they thought yesterday... when they did not think he would survive. Apparently, the part of his stomach that had started to turn purple, which means it is/could be necrotic, had pinked up while they were inside him, checking his heart and spleen. Good thing about all of that, there were no tumors (am trying to stay positive!).

Anyway, with the purple section turning pink, there was only one little spot they were still concerned about. I asked if it was still dark when they closed and she said no, it just was not pinking up like the other area.

The toxins that build in the system post stomach twist, will have passed his system by now. That he is standing, and perking his ears on hearing running water, is a good sign too.

Another 24 hours and he will be getting close to seeing the pasture on the outside of the woods.

Got asked why I would spend, or incur in this case, a $1500+ vet bill for an almost 8 year old great dane.

Six years ago, I was doing overnights and transports for a rescue group. At any one time, I could have upwards of 25 dogs in my guest house kennel. On one occasion, I was asked to save a pup from the gas chamber (euphemism for decompression chamber which I won't go into) so I chose the dachshund/basset hound pup that was 6 weeks old.

I'd been told he'd been fully vetted... a lie. He came to me and within 24 hours was diagnosed with every parasite known to man. Yes, all of them - hook, round, whip, tape... and then he got parvo. His chance of survival since I caught it early was about 60/40 but the cost would be upwards of $2000+. This pup was never going to be mine, he was always a rescue.

That little pup is now living in Brandon, Manitoba with a family that adores him, unaware of the money I spent to save his life. His final vet bill was $2200... his little life, his love of his family, far more worth it than not.

Storm is mine. As long as his chance for a viable life was conceivable, I trusted my vets to make the decision while inside whether or not he could live a few more years.

They chose to try. I choose to have a garage sale to pay the bill :D There is no doubt, the Storm Trooper is far more to me, than just a dog.

UPDATE #5:

Vet called. Storm is resting comfortably. I will be there in the morning to see him.

"Dear God,

Creator of all. Please give Storm strength to endure whichever path you choose, and me the grace to accept.

Thank you for blessing my life with him. And if you really listen to lofted prayer, please let him come home.

Just me."

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Old Pre Meds Conference - Chicago, IL

I would be sorely remiss if I did not openly encourage all those who fit in the "older than dirt doctor wannabes taking pre med classes designed for our kids":

The first group I encountered in deciding whether I was sane, insane, merely slightly sane, or completely bonkers (which has yet to be thoroughly decided but that's a thread for another day) was the oldpremeds.org forum. Each year the forum founders, moderators, volunteers, and others put on a conference designed to encourage and educate those in the group I listed at the top of post.

Here is a link to the forum: http://www.oldpremeds.org/fusionbb/index.php?

Here is a link to the conference: http://www.oldpremeds.org/conference/

Here is my unabashed recommendation to attend

(unless, of course, you've already ascertained that anyone thinking they should start the pre-med path post 45 is already board certified neurologically incomplete as a homo sapien)

Rehab of Sex Offenders

In the past, I've been on search and rescue teams looking for missing women and one autistic man with cerebral palsy. First and foremost in everyone's mind, is find the person... then find the body, then figure out, in criminal cases, who did what.

I'm not sure if sex offenders can be rehabbed. So, what to do with them?

Slam Dunks, a former police officer, offers his insight and a great blog read.

Here it is: http://theslamdunktrove.blogspot.com/2010/04/sex-offenders-what-do-we-do-with-them.html

Kudos to him for tackling an issue in America that many shy away from and shudder in disgust and fear.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Martin Zellar & The Hardaways FTW

Many years ago, I was introduced to Marty at the first ever (insert local charity event) and have been a fan ever since. His lyrics, his CUTENESS (his wife is one very lucky lady...), his smile, his smirk, his... yep, I'm a fan.

Stupid Boy has likewise been a favorite of mine for years, playing loudly when appropriate, getting me through a break-up or two.

For those of you who have never heard of him, give him a listen. He's back in the U.S. now and apparently ready to release another album. Thank God, Marty, you're back!







Stupid Boy Lyrics
I feel sick and I feel used
You ain't the boy I thought I knew
You go and put me on your shelf
You never think of no one else but yourself

And lord I'm sick and lord I'm tired of love
And lord I can't believe it's true
You'd think after five years I would know you but I don't
And after all this time I come to find
You're just another stupid boy
You're just another stupid boy

I'd 've done anything for you
Just about anything you asked me to
I put your needs above my own
And I can't stand to be alone but I live

And lord I'm sick and lord I'm tired of love
And lord I can't believe it's true
Ya know I really thought I knew you but I don't
And after all this time I come to find
You're just another stupid boy
You're just another stupid boy

Sunday, April 18, 2010

MCAT Preparation Overview

Many different companies offer MCAT prep in book, CD, video, and in-class formats each with their own derivation of "how to" solve the MCAT problems and obtain a great composite score.

Via university affiliates some of the classes are discounted and those might prompt one to enroll in their courses. Each individual has to find their own way to navigate the MCAT path but I feel each company has a different strategy.

Kaplan has the tried and true tested format of "here's what you need to know" but not much of the explanations because you are already expected to have a base science knowledge before enrolling in their course. I can't blame them. If you're looking to learn organic chemistry through Kaplan, you might... no you will, fail.

Princeton is similar in format as the Kaplan.

Both are solid for those with base science knowledge, materials distributed in class, lectures designed around helping the individual study more effectively by eliminating a lot of the extra junk most don't need.

I've chosen the Exam Krackers series and to be really quite honest, I use the books to make sure my current course covers the material and also to explain concepts that might otherwise remain fuzzy in my head.

In addition to the regular books for studying, EK also offers extended books with 1001 questions for that particular subject. I like this. The more times one sees a particular question, or type of question, the less stressful the exam should be AND the more obvious the right answer will be.

The drawback for EK, is that if one needs in-class help or rather, in-class, each day expectations so that the procrastinator in oneself doesn't get stymied until T-7 days to MCAT, EK does not offer classes in every major metro. In my case, the closest city they offer in-class instruction is over a day's drive away.

Despite they don't have classes in my city, I do like the layout of the book - less formal, more strategic, more interesting. I like the comic relief which seems just like relief until you realize the comic is meant to help reinforce a concept, "must know" attribute, or exam strategy.

And just in case you are wondering, I am NOT paid by EK nor sponsored nor do I know anyone who works for the company.

It's just my op for the day. Make it a great day!

Friday, April 16, 2010

F R I E N D S

That was my favorite show for years. LOVED Rachel's flighty, flirty character and of course, Jen did that character flawlessly. What I loved about the show, and it's seeming premise "St Elmo's Fire" was the bonds that tie us are difficult to break... the friendship ties.

From an obvious distance I've watched the Sandra Bullock story unfold. My distate for men and women who cheat on their respective spouses and/or s.o. aside, what I find so heartening is the friends that have surrounded Sandra. They are tight lipped in public, and probably openly warm in private... just as friends should be.

As these past two years have unfolded I have likewise found out who my true friends are and honestly, I do not know how I could have made it through without them. They listened to my anger at my job loss and subsequent lawsuit, they guided when I had so many flying decisions coming at me that a hurricane force wind with pine needles would not compare, they laughed when I needed to, and mostly, they just continued to be my friend.

You know who you are, and in keeping with the fairly anonymous ways of this blog, I would not publicly post your names here. Know that like Rachel on FRIENDS, and Sandra in real life, your friendship and your heart have seen me through some very dark days.

Thank you!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Went to the old house yesterday, dropped off the garbage, switched the lights around, let Storm run around in our old yard... the one that has no fence, and tall, green grass sways amongst the pine and birch trees. I stood on the deck taking in the scents of the woods and the blooming flowers. Under the maple trees in the front yard, holes have been dug to bury my beloved Tank, Abby, and the grand dame of them all, Boozer dog. It is still my house. It still smells like my family. It still has some of my things inside. But barring a PowerBall win, or a reprieve from the bank, in two weeks, the house is no longer mine.

My son grew up here - building tree forts in the forest around our home, playing water guns in the river a mere 1/2 block from our backyard, chasing Tank through the woods while stumbling over the fallen trees and rolling boulders.

The house could tell stories: the night the tornado sirens wailed, yet we were safe inside, down in the crawl space never worrying whether or not we would survive, hearing nothing of the winds howling nearby; the afternoons spent silently upon the expansive deck, watching the young fawns creep quietly out of the woods, their mothers nearby and then falling asleep in the middle of the backyard, curled up like cloven dachshunds; the year the flood waters rose so high, I had geese and mallards building nests in my back yard, swimming aimlessly through the seepage built lake that gave them a home and sanctuary away from the fox who loved to traipse through the yard at all times - day or night; the weeks I spent while planning a different home in a different nearby city with a different kitchen and obviously, a different life; the Christmas's spent with the 15' tall pine trees fully lit with white lights and green cords, only adornments coming from the golden balls, and red ornaments from each year of my son's life; the afternoon my son came home from school in tears and terror having been threatened by some thug kids on the bus with a knife and me going into a fit to protect my "cub" and us sitting on the couch, me hugging him tightly trying to protect the greatest gift in my life; and more...

Locking the front door quietly, taking in the sight of the eagle soaring overhead silently looking for fish in the nearby river, Storm panting out the back window of the truck, I started to leave (again)... with the radio playing:



The Lyrics:

I know they say you cant go home again.
I just had to come back one last time.
Ma'am I know you don't know me from Adam.
But these handprints on the front steps are mine.

And up those stairs, in that little back bedroom
is where I did my homework and I learned to play guitar.
And I bet you didn't know under that live oak
my favorite dog is buried in the yard.

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
this brokenness inside me might start healing.
Out here its like I'm someone else,
I thought that maybe I could find myself
if I could just come in I swear I'll leave.
Won't take nothing but a memory
from the house that built me.

Mama cut out pictures of houses for years.
From 'Better Homes and Garden' magazines.
Plans were drawn, concrete poured,
and nail by nail and board by board
Daddy gave life to mama's dream.

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
this brokenness inside me might start healing.
Out here its like I'm someone else,
I thought that maybe I could find myself.

If I could just come in I swear I'll leave.
Won't take nothing but a memory
from the house that built me.

You leave home, you move on
and you do the best you can.
I got lost in this whole world
and forgot who I am.

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
this brokenness inside me might start healing.
Out here its like I'm someone else,
I thought that maybe I could find myself.

If I could walk around I swear I'll leave.
Won't take nothing but a memory
from the house that built me.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Speaks For Itself

Jaron: "The Long Road To Love" - okay... biting tongue...



and if that weren't priceless enough, here is a tribute and real picture of my high school ... ermmm... friend.. Sir Dressabum Holly... mind you, he has a high rank within the U.S. military and is in charge of an African embassy.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Nothing To Do With Pre-Med - Security Words

But I've started compiling a list of the words one must spell and input at the end of some people's comment sections (and other types of security prone sites).

Will be posting some of them here along with their definitions, if warranted.

Today's word, or site in this base:

Obili

A site in Hyderabad, India which through personal experience I know is a booming technology area and an ever increasing place for off-shoring of IT for various global companies.

Coinicl

A myriad of differentiated coins hung in suspended animation via water. Kind of like coneheads but only prettier.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Finding Balance Between Son's Life & Mine

Today, my son needed to be at his very new job at 7 AM. Totally bunks up my typical Sunday of planting my butt in the library conference room at the school and hunkering down to do homework problems and study. Generally, after 9 hours of sitting in the library, I've completed all the next week's assignments so I can focus on life instead.

Son needed to be at work at 7 AM. I was still groggy. Went back to bed. Son gets off work at 3 PM and of course, wants a ride home (we live about 1.5 miles from the job site). So, to mix it up a little more, I take Concerta.

I'm a mindless, wandering mess without it. "Ooooh, look it's sunny outside which means the ray is about 560 nm which is calculated using Planck's constant, speaking of which the constant in my life is the great dane and the golden retriever who really needs a trim and like, wow, maybe I should go blonder for the summer" all in the span of maybe 5 seconds. Yeah, that's my brain OFF Concerta.

Anyway, the side effect of Concerta is that I'm... focused. Very focused. Once in that zone, it is hard to break the concentration and also, once the concentration is broken almost impossible to get back on track. If I take the medication after 10 AM, I'm unable to sleep at night essentially pulling a physically exhausting but mentally stimulating overnighter of which, I do not want.

So, I'm sitting in a coffee house right now, typing on this blog, wondering if at 12:30 PM I should take a Concerta, get started on my homework problems, get caught up and assignments that are late into the instructor OR if I should "well, it's a sunny day out, take the dane for a run, and check out the new shoes which would be awesome because Asics came out with new Nimbus' this year and once this year is over I will be applying to med school, not merely looking at it and like wow, my eyes are bad, I should get new cheaters which I hate by the way because anyone who cheats should be kicked out of school..."

You get the picture.

Grrr. Guess I'll take it, get the work I can done, pray I can get back on track after picking him up, and pray that he doesn't have another early morning shift anytime soon!

Opening Up My Blog To Other Writers

There are a fair amount of hits per week on this blog, getting close to 1000 per week (I know many of you are that per day but... you probably live far more interesting lives than I do).

Anyway, I thought maybe it might be fun to open up my blog, once per week to another author.

If you would like to submit your writing to be posted here, along with a link to your blog, website, ebay, etc, send me an email at:

adoc2be@yahoo.com

My preference would be ideas on med school, pre med, political related to medicine, nursing v. doctoring, MD v DO v PA v NP v DN (or whatever they are going to call a PhD in Nursing), dogs, cats, rescue, volunteering, community service, or you know, if you just have a huge contract for someone with my background, that'd be awesome too!

Any writing containing utter profanity, anything not PG-13 rated, will be ignored and deleted. If you'd be embarrassed to have your mother or your father reading it, don't send it my way. :)

Anyway, we'll see how it goes. And no, this doesn't mean others will write this blog it just means that one time per week I'm brainless and lacking any creative energy to post something and maybe on that day, I'd channel someone else's energy and writing thereby giving them a shout-out and exposure to his/her site.

Make it a great day!

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Ochem 1 and Biology During Summer

I'm thinking about it.

Ochem is without lab. The lab comes after 2nd semester of ochem and is worth more credits than either ochem 1 plus ochem 2 lecture.

Biology is every night M - Th.

Ochem 1 is every day M -Th.

That would allow me to focus on ochem 2 in fall, and physics with lab, plus an American Indian studies class (humanities requirements filler that will be new, and no included in old ugrad GPA).

It would also allow me to toss in biochem at the UD level in fall... which would be ideal because then come spring it'd be:

ochem lab - 4 cr
physics 1 - 4 cr
MCAT prep

Now for a little contract to come about so I can pay for it all!!! And not be scrambling to pay the rent.

Friday, April 9, 2010

Sorry...

So, apparently my venting on a fairly anonymous forum has upset a few folks and they have quit being regular readers. For that, I apologize. I'm trying to keep my blog helpful and insightful. Helpful in giving links, ideas, etc and insightful with how hard this journey is on an emotional, mental, and physical level.

Sometimes, I overstep my boundaries.

Hope you will continue to read and just give me a little nudge when I've gone too far.

Make it a great day!

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Contract Went Poof (edited)

I thought my financial challenges were finally over. Not so… I was contacted by a hiring manager who needed two people for contracts that are with other VERY LARGE companies, companies like the ones I worked for; before I went crazy and embarked on my path to become a doc. He tendered both the full time position and contract to me and told me to pick. I chose the contract...

After all I can't be full time until I'm in residency (yes, I really said that). Anyway, contract it was. It would have been awesome to finally get back on my feet with money in the bank and to ending my near term financial challenges (my long term challenges are another story)... So did it happen? Noooooooo. The HR department caught wind of this and got upset that a mere VICE PRESIDENT went around them to get what hire whom he felt was the best qualified person for the job (i.e. me).

How DARE he!!!

So in a flash, like Santa up the chimney and FiFi's hair piece at the Westminster Dog Show, my contract went pooooooof! That really really sucks, but a good friend of mine always says “things always happen for a reason.” I know he’s right but dang it, I really needed that money. I was looking forward to not having to wrap pennies to afford a $5.00 pizza from Hungry Howies for my son and I to share. But I guess situations like these build character and helps prepare me for those 36 and 48 hour shifts I’ll no doubt be dealing with during my residency and internship.

How much can I take before I break? Go ahead and bring it on…but while you are at it, a nice job offer where I can balance work and school and pay my bills would really be nice too (hint, hint).

Okay, I'm done ranting. Just bummed. The contract would have been awesome. Great Dane puppy is... still available too. Dang. Arooooooooooooo….

(thanks mr pac... I owe you; actually, my future patients owe you but just for giggles, can I, once I'm divine, be like dr. grumpy and just let loose?!?!?)

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Fall Term :D

Am thinking of taking these:

American Indian Studies (UD humanities class and an area that I think would be interesting given my rural family practice desire)

Biochem (UD, and only if I take organic 1 this summer which would conflict with physics or biology which I'd like to knock out)

Physics (LD, if I don't take over the summer; both physics 1 and 2)

Organic (UD, but only if I take physics this summer; and then it would knock out biochem until spring)

Pharmacology (UD, medications and the diseases the meds treat; specifically designed for pre-meds and pre-pharms)

That would leave the following for next spring:

Organic 2 (considering whether or not I took organic 1 during summer or fall; possibly could be done with organic 2 in fall :D :D :D)

Genetics or Microbiology

MCAT PREP CLASS - thinking Princeton but really like EK books so far (they've likewise helped clarify principles I did not quite grasp in chemistry class)

Which finally leads me to... LE GASP... applying to med school... assuming, of course, I don't end up with a slew of dreaded "B"'s... erghhh... must-not-go-there-headache-sets-in...

Let the dream REALLY begin!

Too Good Not To Post



It ranks right up there with Dr. Dalai's post on Obama's ... erm.. package and Happy's post on nasty men shirts. Oh, and I stole this from Dr. Grumpy ... who's a hilarious read (if he'd figure out how to add my blog to his list of reads...)

Yep, once in awhile I want to take my Sarcasma medication. Like when my mother goes on and on and on and... about how so-and-so is marrying a doctor and how well he treats her and how blah blah blah and how I want to utter something nasty back and instead, I pop a Sarcasma. :D

Friday, April 2, 2010

Everything I Needed To Know Re: Letters

I learned in about 3rd grade, from the teacher that made me sit in the hallway, with my desk facing the wall... all year.

One, fold the letter in three, with the address for individual or company on outside, then back, then forward so the ensuing paper looks like an inverted "N".

Two, stuff the envelope such that the name and address are the first items one sees upon opening the envelope.

Three, use nifty water bottle to lick/stick envelopes shut.

Four, use appropriate postage.

Five, kiss letters goodbye.

Why would I devote an entire blog post about this?

Because. Because once upon a time I was the vice president of a very large, global, publicly held company running an efficient and cost-effective group of 25 individuals... (yes, I realize that is a fragmented sentence!)... Because once upon a time, I had no dream and no direction. Because once upon a time, I had $kad$ in the bank, checks rolling in, and time/money were my friends.

Now, I'm a poor college student making ends meet, looking for that elusive contract opportunity, and remembering 3rd grade (and the teacher who hated me most). Now, I'm chasing a dream and doing anything (and everything) I can, to get there.

Here's to licking stamps... almost done. Award letters (and not so) for those who applied during this year's open call for proposals.

Looking forward to being done with this!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Showing Great Danes ...

My toe is perched above the water of showing great danes. For several years, I've meandered to different dog shows, watched the magnificent dogs and considered owning a show dog.

It is not taken lightly.

Unlike the pet in the house, the show dog is... well... different. It is almost like they "know" they are special much like the blond haired, blue-eyed, porcelain skinned cheerleader in high school knows "she" is special too. The pup I'm looking at is gorgeous.

Why a puppy with all that I have going on?

Hobby time. For years I have had none save for the horse I owned and hoped to enter into dressage - before she tossed me on my head (oooh... that may explain a thing or two...) and my hidden gamer talent (look up Etheryelle on any server in Warcraft and you know the rest of THAT story) that I only take out of the box when my son asks me to. Beyond that - I've hit a few golf balls - straight, I might add - , played a few instruments with some modicum of mediocrity, and read boring books that sound patterned and lame after three or four by same author (Patterson, if you're wondering).

So, a show puppy is possibly coming home. A loving, warm blooded friend to work with and enjoy while he prances and "knows" he is special. A loving and beloved fur kid to keep me occupied on weekend when books and lab reports need to be on the backburner. A puppy to allow my brain to love doing something else... and possibly along the way, new friends.

What to do?!

By the way, great danes are among the finest of dogs. Those of you with little "fifi's" or prima donna poodles know - the small dogs are awesome... but the wow factor comes with a dane.

Danes are different. They "know" they are something else and sometimes, they even act as if they are truly the “shiz”… Of all the breeds I’ve owned, rescued, transported, loved, grieved over, and adored, the danes have captivated me like none other. They don’t eat as much as one might think, they don’t poop as much either
J Healthy, well bred danes are not prone to gastric torsion (bloat) or other dysplastic problems, and also come with an amazing temperament. Danes.

I know what I want to do. Question is, will I?!