Monday, November 21, 2011

In Case, I've Forgotten To Mention

My son is awesome!  Many years ago, when he was about 9, our living situation was up in the air.  I'd been offered a job to relocate to Florida, a place both my son and I loved.  The situation made me nervous as it would mean leaving my elderly parents behind and honestly, I'd always thought when the one passed, that the other would have a place in my then guest house.

Ten, eleven years later, they're both still alive, my house is long gone :)

Anyway, I'd asked my son how he felt about moving back to FL (we'd been living there before when MetLife was going public and the company put him and me up in a condo for the 1.5 years we were there).  It is not like I was wanting his blessing to move, more that I wanted him to feel like he had a voice in our lives, that he was not subjected to the whims of his mother more than was required (I'm speaking of concerts, Olympics, and sporting events here!).

At 9, he sat in his room one night, must have waited forever for me to leave the room, and put a picture on my pillow so that when I finally went to bed, I would not miss it.

It was a picture of a little boy holding his mother's hand, fully colored, with hearts around the people, saying, "I love you, no madder (sic) where we move"... I think I choked up.

I sill have it.  Ten years later.  It still warms my heart, and kept it warm, when things were hard, back when he was a teenager and I wondered if he loved me back, or if... I think all parents go through that when their kids are teens.

Yesterday, I went to the library as is well noted.  Generally, I leave at 9 AM on Saturday morning, and return home sometime around 10:30 PM.  That's been my life since September, and not one weekend has changed since then.  It might deviate an hour earlier but generally, I'm at the library and/or at school in the commons area after the library closes for about 13 hours.

Last night, when I met the other ochem students, time flew.  Emma was so very helpful, and so kind, and so compassionate; and then she shared her story.  And then we talked.  And we worked on ochem.  And we talked some more.  And we studied ochem.  And then we talked some more.

And then it was 4 AM.

I'd been gone for almost 24 hours.  I had no idea it was that late/early and was worried about my drive home as the first snow/sleet had hit the city.

Driving home was a bit slippery.  I drive a huge BUS  SUV with full time 4-wheel drive but I was still cautious.  Plows were out sanding, cars were slow; even at 4:30 (the time from leaving until getting home was 1/2 hour).

When I walked in, my son was up and on his cell phone.  He was pasty white.

"She just walked in the door."

"Yes, she's okay.  Thank you."

I asked who he was on the phone with.  He said the local police department... he was scared.  He said when I did not come home at my usual time, and my cell phone was dead, and it was late, and the roads were bad, and there are some darkened hallways at school, and ... he was terrified something had happened to me.

He sobbed as I hugged him and told him he did the absolute right thing.  He sobbed some more saying, he was so scared that something had happened to me.

And right then, I knew.  I had wondered if he really did love his mom still, after all we've been through.

And good Lord, I'm blessed.  What an awesome son, a tender son, and he is truly, the love and light of my life.

Have you hugged your kids today?!


Lynda Halliger-Otvos said...

Yes, I have hugged my daughter today and the hug was just so sweet and gentle. She knew my arthritic hip was pestering so she came to bedroom to find me when she arrived and again when she went on her way. We are blessed to have such compassionate woobers.

A Doc 2 Be said...

Very sorry to hear your hip is giving you trouble! Compassionate kids. Two best words. Ever!

Slamdunk said...

Your son is awesome. I hope our gang makes mom and dad as proud as they continue to get older.