Wednesday, July 4, 2012

To My New Readership

When I started writing this blog, it was going to specifically and only aimed at guiding other non-traditional premeds through the roller-coaster that is this path.  From getting an A- on an exam to a B in a course, the drops of sweat the condense on our brows is equally met with emotional highs and lows, no matter one's personal emotional make up.  Pre med is h.a.r.d.

This blog turned into a venting place for me.  At times my life was beyond difficult over the past 4 years and while I dealt with those obstacles pretty effectively, there were some painful points.

There still are at times.

My son was hearing impaired due to the 1/10,000 chance of a reaction to the pertussis vaccine.  When he was an infant the drug companies used deactivated live bacteria to obtain immunizations.  He became a statistic and lost his hearing.

In the 3rd grade we moved to a village far east of the large metro area I lived in.  On his first day, he was told by a rather smug and self-absorbed 3rd grader that "he must be close to death because he was like an old man wearing a hearing aid."

To those of us as adults, we can laugh off such an absurd comment.  For an 8 year old with a deceased brother, it was terrifying.

That smug 3rd grader - the one who tormented him for months from 3rd grade to 6th grade: knives at school, chasing him off the bus with fake but real looking guns to the point where he stopped at a neighbor's house and knocked on the door in terror ...

was the now tramp-stamped girl on my Galapagos boat.

My post vented about her.  It was not as much about what she did to me, but the memories of what she did to my son.

I am easily able to forgive and forget that which is done to me.  It is far harder, if not impossible, for me to forgive and forget that which is done to my son.  In trying to be polite to her, she showed her true colors.  Again.

So, know that if you continue to read here, for the most part I'm pretty affable, likable if not lovable, but I do get angry and sometimes, I come here to blow off steam in what used to be a fairly anonymous blog.

Enjoy a happy 4th of July!  We are :D


NP Odyssey said...

All I can say is I understand.
I do not know what it felt like or what you went through, but your job is to protect your child. Sounds like you are being a mom to me.
As for venting on a blog, it is good to get thing out and you are anonymous.

A Doc 2 Be said...

Thank you, NP.

Unfortunately, I'm not that anonymous anymore; people who know me from "back there" have not seen me angry, but now know that I do have the emotion.

More tactful language is required, I guess despite that inside my head is what got typed on the blog.

C'est la vie!

Red Stethoscope said...

I just felt the same sort of rage you probably did when your son was 8 and called said girl a bad word. Oh, well. You were the bigger person and survived. Plus, Galapagos!!! There were bigger fish to fry and better things to see than her face.

A Doc 2 Be said...

I am a bigger person so I'm a bit saddened that people who don't know me got the first impression when reading I called her an appropriate word. For, after all, she is what she is :)

Thanks, Red!

Cartoon Characters said...

You are doing what any person/animal would do: Protect her young.

Don't feel bad or apologize about anything you write, after all - it's your blog.

Btw, I know I would feel exactly the same as you.

Now - go and enjoy yourself! You deserve it! :)